TAKING BACK GIVEN GIFTS

Imagine, 
someone asking back for a gift that they have given you.

I know, sucks right. And really "loser-ish".

But that was what the government wanted to do a few weeks ago…

It was reported on The Straits Times on 3rd Feb, "Funding cuts for top independent schools in Singapore" and this was called for to make all schools equal.

Well, may I interest you in something?

It was back in 2006 when the government initiated the GEP to encourage students to work hard to become better and get into good schools. And now, it seems like the government doesn't want students to work hard anymore… or that might seem to be the case. If not, why take away the privileges given to "good" schools?

I was really confused to why the government wanted to make ALL schools, GOOD schools and I thought it was a rather stupid move. So, I went on to find out why, and came a conclusion. Which is because many Singaporeans are complaining about schools not being equal -_-

I honestly see this "making ALL schools, good schools" as nothing more than a populist move.  
And a really stupid one.

I mean, if all schools are equal, then why would a student even work hard since at the end of the day, no matter however good his/her score is, he/she would end up in the same school just like everybody else?

And it was also stated along the line of schools would use fans instead of air cons due to the funding cut blahblah. So I jokingly said to my brother "lol. can you imagine people like you who worked so hard to get into the top schools won't be able to enjoy air con anymore while people who scored badly like me are 'rewarded' with air cons". 

Moreover, what's more stupid/retarded about this whole issue is that it isn't even the students themselves who are complaining but the parents -.-
I mean, IF MAJORITY OF THE STUDENTS, WE, ARE OKAY WITH THE DIFFERENT BANDING OF SCHOOLS, WHY YOU PARENTS, WHO ARE NO LONGER SCHOOLING, COMPLAINING?!!?

Because you want your child to have equal footing? 

But FUN FACT, the so called "equal footing" is earned through hard work so they can get into the top schools. NOT though whatever kind of measures you, weak Singaporeans, want the government to take.

 In the end, it only makes a large segment of the Singaporeans happy (but not for long because "weak" Singaporeans will never be happy), a small segment of the of them angry. And it contributes exactly nothing to the equal distribution of wealth and other underlying problems of inequity in Singapore.

Don't adults always teach us that 

"IF YOU WANT SOMETHING, WORK HARD FOR IT"

AND NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT IT.

P/s. I got so so sooooo much to say about this issue but I am so lazy now to put whatever I've told my parents/brothers into this post. (You should have heard me in person. I think I made a hell lot of sense)

P/s/s. I know there was another report that came out which says that the report on funding being cut for top schools have said to be inaccurate but honestly, both are stupid. Because on the new reported one, it says that the used of air cons should be cut down so to be "ecologically sustainable and cost-effective." Which is still, taking away the privileges that you get to enjoy being in a good school. And also, if the government wants to be cost-effective and ecologically sustainable, they should start with their offices first, don't you think so? ;)

MAD RUSH THANKS TO A WRONG MOVE

Hello guys.

This is the last week of school.

And instead of feeling free/a sense of relief,

I AM IN A MAD RUSH.

YES.

WHY?

Because today, 

I decided to book my driving test on impulse without actually calculating how long I need to take and how much I actually have, to finance myself all the way to my test date.

So...

I BASICALLY HAVE 40 DAYS TO RUSH THROUGH EVERYTHING

And I don't have enough time,

nor do I have enough money.

>:(

#FML

Oh, btw if you were wondering, I am only at stage 2.8 right now and I have to complete to stage 5.1 by the 39th day.

+ I can only clear max, 2 stages each lesson.

And if you're wondering why I am only at 2.8 right now, it's because you actually have to go through different procedures if you are learning driving from school. -Yeah, procedures for the school to earn your money and waste your time.

And I only go for driving lessons once every month and sometimes once in 2 months!!

OH MY GOD I NEED A MIRACLE!

Driving aside, it's 2 more days to the end of my school term and then it's exams and I'll be going for internship the next semester.

There are things in which I will miss,

things I won't.

And it'll also mean going to a new environment, yet again.

Trying to adapt, trying to move on and let go.

The past few months have been bearable without having Steffy, Isabel and Wenting because I've met this group of girls, some which I've known but have never really opened up/gotten close to.

I'm glad to be in the same class as certain people especially people from my year1sem1 class.

And I'm thankful to be given another chance to get to know them and have them get to know me better to make up for my "wasted time" in year1sem1 trying to adapt to a new environment and trying to open up to a new group of people.

Received lots of love the moment I reached school on Friday which was Valentine's.

And I was pretty much depressed after that for idk what reason. A sudden familiar pang of darkness just hit me and I kept crying for no reason.

Left my house for a walk at night and I was walking to nowhere.

Minjiang and John lim came to find me after. Thank God for good friends and we went over to Jurong Park to meet Eugene and they accompanied me to walk around till I was feeling okay.

And later at 12am, they drove to my estate wanting to chill and we ended up having a picnic at the void deck. LOL

On Sunday, my fan and I went to the Singapore Airshow 2014!!

Finally back to going to exhibitions, events etc with my family ever since I stopped working on Sundays. Also, really thankful that Joanne found a new part timer to cover me!

(more photos will be uploaded on Facebook)

And on Monday, which was yesterday,

Faeza and I decided to leave class halfway through to get our eggs benedict because we were looking at pictures of it and wanted to have it pretty badly.

Went all the way down to holland and realized that Hatched was close >:(

Settled for D'Good Cafe in the end

Also, received cupcakes form Faeza today!!

^^

GONNA SHOWER AND SLEEP BCUZ I NEED IT

GOOD NIGHT

And he said, “You’re really good at not letting people love you. But do you realize while doing that, you're hurting them too?”. 

The truth is, I just can't help it. One try, two try, it all failed. And each time I remind myself to open up and trust, I'm exposing myself to disappointments . And I get that, everyone goes through the same thing. But I take a longer time than most people do to get myself back up again and I can't help but shut everyone else out. Why can't people, instead of telling me to open up and trust, give me no reason to doubt?

Like I've said before,
maybe the reason why I push the people I love away is because I don't wanna be the one to be pushed away.

Esplanade Presents: Limelight 2014

If you've been reading/following my blog, 

the word "Swiss Winds" shouldn't be something new to you by now.

I've talked about Swiss Winds on many occasion, it's something that means a lot to me, something that I'm proud of…

http://chharmanchh.blogspot.sg/2013/04/is-band-worth-it.html

Anyway, it's been 2 years every since I've passed out from Swiss Winds and a lot has changed.

Even Swiss Wind's very own percussion drum solo changed!

Not only have Swiss Winds changed, Swiss Winds has also improved, advance, upgraded, whatever (DUH!!) This year,

YESSSSSSS! SWISS WIND'S BIANNUAL SERENADE IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND THIS TIME, EVEN BETTER!!

WE'RE MOVING TO GREATER HEIGHTS!

SWISS WINDS IS PERFORMING AT ESPLANADE!!

Repertoire includes: 

A Jupiter Fantasy by Yasuhide Ito 
Selections from the Phantom of the Opera arr. Warren Barker
Selections from Les Miserables arr. Warren Barker 
Rolling in the Deep arr. Michael Brown 

Tickets are available at Sistic.

http://www.sistic.com.sg/events/ncccb0414

For more info, https://www.facebook.com/commandband

Prices stated here are different, I know. The prices shown are are inclusive of sistic booking fees. Will update once I get the confirmed ticket price.

Old Songs

Last minute decision to head to Attica last night and so, I left my bag in Joanne's car and haven't got it back. Today, my brother kindly lent me his old iPhone so that I can use it as a mp3 on my way to work.
I'm not someone who listens to pop music. I rarely do. So I was listening to all the old pop songs in my brother's old phone and these were the few songs in which out of the rest of the songs, I recognise... And left me feeling a little depressed.

Daughtry- No surprise
Jesse McCartney- Told you so

It's weird how old songs can bring back so much memories and feelings. These songs were songs I listened to in sec3, when I was at the lowest point of my life. -Clarence was the one who introduced them to me. These were the songs in which I deleted from my phone and laptop once I was out of that phrase of my life. Because I didn't want to "dwell" in the past. In the state when I was depressed.
4years have passed and it's almost 5years now. I haven't heard any of the songs since then.
But no matter how long it is, songs no matter how old, would bring you back to how you were feeling at the point of time. The memories etc

How I was depressed, how Clarence was always there for me. How Clarence and Minjiang bought food for me bcuz I wasn't eating and I ended up shouting at them. How I kept going back and fourth because I couldn't let go. How I used to cry in school daily; that crying in class already become a norm for my friends to see. And yet, despite that, they never stopped trying to find different ways and methods to make me smile. How I used to cry myself to sleep. How all the teachers in school cared for me because they saw a huge change in me. And how Mr Ethan Wong once called me to his desk during class and asked "are you happy?" in chinese.

I'm so glad I'm out of that stage.
And I'm glad even though listening to these songs do take me back to feeling how I was feeling back then, I know I'll be fine after awhile -I hope so.
I never want to go back there.

Next song on playlist: Cry on my shoulder
(Another song that brings back memories…)

Sent via BlackBerry from SingTel!

CNY 2014

SUPSUPSUP.

I just came back from Minjiang's place for steamboat and I thought I would shower and go to bed but noooo. I just suddenly have this urge to blog.

SO HERE AM I!

(My plan was to sleep by 12am. Guess it failed again)

I feel like I'm getting my "blogging spirit" back!

YAY!!

I just wish I had more time like in the past, before I entered poly to slowly sit down and blog about things, my life, my thoughts etc. 

LIFE SUCKS WHEN YOU HAVE TO GROW UP.

Last Sunday was my first time in YEARS that I didn't have to work not because of any special occasion but because Joanne got a new part timer to cover me!! The past weeks before CNY have been so hectic, frustrating and busy for me, I almost couldn't take it. Plus the fact that I only had 5 days to complete all my work because I always work on Sat and Sun = weekends burned + I had tests almost daily after school. So obviously, I felt really relief when Joanne told me she got someone to cover me.

Went for some Art Exhibition with my fam after service before going for lunch @ Olive Vine. 

Got to eat one of my fav chocolate cake!!

After which, my family and I went shopping over at Raffles Place

On the following Wednesday, I met up with Saiful for dinner at LerkThai while waiting for Theo to come and meet us. Went to Railmall after that and drank a little before heading home.

Then on Thursday, I decided to give class a miss because, WHO THE F*** HAS A FULL DAY LESSON ON THE EVE OF CNY?!?! SIAO DING DONG. I GOT MY REUNION DINNER TO ATTEND. Gave class a miss and went back to Swiss with Theo!

OHHHH. ALSO, I MENTIONED ON TWITTER THAT THEO IS NOW JUST STAYING A FEW BLKS AWAY FROM ME!! I was so damn happy and excited!! I've been hoping for her to stay near me every since sec4!

So for the first time ever, we met each other at the void deck and headed to school together! ^^

And we collected ang boas from teachers. lol. REAL ANG BAO W MONEY INSIDE BTW.

We separated after the celebration and I went off to meet my fam for lunch and  JEM for some last minute shopping.

The eve of CNY didn't go so well for me at night…

I FELL DOWN AGAIN

I was trying to clear my table and I stood on foldable chair trying to get a box out of my wardrobe when I fell and cried for 30mins++

It was pretty bad (no kidding, not exaggerating) especially because my injury was at the exact same spot on my leg that I had once gotten injured before from falling (as usual) when I was younger and it left a pretty bad scar.

And this time, it was worse because the area where my scar was only recovered on the surface. Which means the flesh under my skin where the scar is, didn't grow back at all. 

What's worse was that instead of comforting me, my youngest brother actually came and took a video of me crying -_-

Just talking about my injury and thinking about the scar that's gonna be left on my leg makes me really depressed.

URGH

MOVING ON.

 As usual, CNY Day1 was spent visit relatives

 I kinda surprised everyone with my outfit as well. 

I WAS WEARING A SKIRT THAT IS AT KNEE LENGTH! 

For the first time, my attire is the longest among all my other cousins. AHAHAH. 

Mine used to be the shortest. lol (except for a year when I was wearing a maxi dress)

 And CNY Day2 as usual was spent out with my dad's secondary school friends, visiting his friends' relatives/ my childhood friends' grandparents

And CNY Day3 like every year, was at my place!

And just like every year, I am the only one in the family who doesn't invite anybody to my place. lol.

I'm just not comfortable with having people come over to my place and me having to serve them/entertain them to make them feel comfortable.

It's just not me. When someone feels uncomfortable, they make me feel uncomfortable too EVEN THOUGH IT'S AT MY OWN HOUSE.

So I just don't invite anyone to save the trouble and all the uncomfortableness. 

The one people whom I've ever invited were my girls (TSFY) because they always make themselves feel welcome and comfortable without causing any inconvenience etc. Sometimes even come uninvited. lol

However, I was called to meet up with Eugene and Theo around 9plus because they were all around Yewtee so I ended up bringing them over to my place!

Steamboat at Minjiang's place today with the band people and tomorrow too with the clique.

I'm tired as hell.

Good night. 

Mind Over Matter

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" well, you're not sorry and I'm not sorry for not having you back so kindly stop wasting "efforts" and drop your act.

I'm so glad my vision's cleared, "friends forever" are just some words; spoken too soon and mean so little. Time will tell they say- when tough times come you see who's near, my dear friend, you're no longer here.

And people always say it's mind over matter.

Cause I don't mind as you no longer matter.