December 13, 2009

To see you again

I want a boy who will tell me when I’m being stupid. Who won’t baby me with his words. A boy who will still give time to his friends. A boy who will tell me ‘No’. He will watch stupid movies with me, but makes me watch his favorites also. A boy who’s willing to drop everything to be with me, but knows when to let it be. A boy who will know he’s important to me, but won’t mind when I change my plans to help someone out. I want a boy who’s enjoyable to look at, he doesn’t have to be gorgeous. I just want someone who I can pay attention to. A boy who will randomly bring me food, cause he knows I love to eat. A boy who can make
jokes about me, a boy that I can laugh with. Someone who wont mind when I even embarrass myself. A boy who will buy me something, something I would actually want, none of that jewelry crap. Someone who doesn’t do everything I ask but when it comes to something important I can count on him to be there. Someone who I don’t feel threatened by. A boy who has other friends that are girls, but I can trust him with them. A boy who will know when to leave me alone when I have my stupid fits. A boy who I can just sit with. I don’t need the whole fairytale deal; I just want to feel comfortable

(Note: ask me personally)

Band dinner is tomorrow, band camp and it's the 17th. yay!


I’m not always as confident as I seem. There are many nights and many days when all I want is to be held. I love being held. Always. Sometimes I don’t want to talk about what is bothering me.. sometimes I just want a hug.. Someone who will let me cry. I like when boys cry in front of me — when people aren’t afraid to show what they’re really feeling. I don’t like when people run from their true feelings because it doesn’t do anyone any good. I wear my heart on my sleeve, but I am not naive. I know what it feels like to be completely broken and I am all too familiar with what it means to be hurt. I know what it’s like to see
something funny and not laugh. I’ve been taken advantage of, used, and abused. My feelings have been blatantly disregarded. But I still believe that all people are good at heart. And my trust in people has not diminished. To be completely honest, I hope it never does. Ever.

Letting go of someone special to you is hard, but holding on to someone who doesn't feel the same is much harder.

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CHARMMAN
kiss on you!