I am messed up

My eyes were swollen today, wasn't it obvious that I've cried. And you ignored that fact. What the heck?

I need a place to rant.

I am in a mess, my life is a mess.
A new year is starting and I am worried I can't start it perfectly. I am afraid that I will screw it up and my year will be messed up again.

I am not ready for a new year. I need to clear all these shit I've been in this year.
I am vex.. very vexed.